Break-Up Season....

So it's officially Spring/Summer time and yall know what that means! 

It's time for fellas to start acting out and ladies to start dressing less. 

Which means what? An extreme decrease in the amount of monogamous relationships! 

I know it's bad to think that way..but it's the truth! I've already had like 4 of my friends tell me that their relationship recently came to end. And while I can't really say that Spring time was the cause of the demise of their partnerships, can we really say it's not the cause of so many others? ....didn't think so

But regardless of why it is, THIS is the time where most couples fail....so this is the time where I spend most of my time listening to friends who are heartbroken or reading status updates and tweets from people who wanna say "i miss him..." or "I still love you..." or something to that effect. 

And this might seem sooooo horrible, but I get BEYOND annoyed by that! Not because they're doing it, but because it lasts FOREVER! At what point do get the hell up and begin to move on? 

Now I recently went through a "break-up" so to speak...and I didn't even tell anyone about it. It was just over. One of my friends called me today actually and was like "how's ____? where's he at?" .....to which I responded "Hell if I know!"  I'm not one for the sitting around and moping and being depressed and crying...I don't have time for that shit. I got 3 papers to write and someones deposit to make! I'm not about to be wasting my time crying over no man! I GOT SHIT TO DO! 

Now everyone who knows me knows when I'm giving myself to someone, I go all in ...no need in half stepping and playing games. So all my friends always ask me how it's so easy for me to just move on...so let me try to break it down for yall...

I've only had...2 (i think) heartbreaks in my life. The first one was with a dude named Brian, I was 15. He was my first love, my first real relationship etc. When he and I broke up, I thought the world was over. I cried, I didn't wanna talk to anyone or be around anyone...it was so serious to me that I actually moved out of my mom's house and moved in with my father so I could just get away from everyone. No one knew where I was but my family...and Brian of course (I wanted to work things out...)...shit's crazy  right? Totally relocated for like 3 or 4 months....I did the whole I'm gonna stay in bed and mope and cry all day thing. Then one day I was like No. I was just tired of it all. Tired of looking like hell while this nigga was out doing his own thing! So from that day on, I promised myself I would NEVER allow myself to get like that again. No man is worth it. 

So from that point on...I haven't. Every dude that's come and gone..it's just kinda been like...oh well. Don't get me wrong, some of them hurt more than others, but I've always had the mentality that I had to keep it movin...there was no time to waste being sad and sitting by the phone waiting for him to call when he usually wasn't going to. 

The second "heartbreak" was Avery. OMG! He was probably the closest thing I'd come to being in a REAL relationship since Brian. Me and Brian broke up in 05..me and Avery didn't meet until 08-09..so it had a been a while. (Just cause I wasn't crying, doesnt mean I wasn't still hurting!  LOL) Putting all my cards on the table, Avery's the dude I told yall about before when I said I kinda wished I would have done things differently and hoped we could fix it etc. Anyway, that situation was great..until it wasn't. We were just at different points in life...wanted different things at the time. So when it ended, I was crushed and ALMOST went back to the crying/depressed shit. 

Almost...but I didn't. Why? Because I have to much to live for and I have too many people who love me and want to see me happy. The key to getting through a break up without all the tears and pain is to have the best support system you can have. I have a great group of friends who will not allow me to be sad or angry. Anytime I'm around them I have to smile and laugh. I don't have an option! I go to them for advice and they listen. When I'm trippin..they tell me! That's all I need. When you feel like you'll never smile or laugh again if you have good friends...that'll never be an option for you. 

I remember talking to one of my best friends about the last guy and kinda being upset about it and she was like "Enjoy him while he's there...if he's there 3 or 4 weeks down the line that's great but if he's not..someone else will be and you WILL be okay but you can't let one heartbreak break you...", I think I'll live with those words forever. Love for others is strong and amazing but love for yourself should be infinite and no one should be able to take away your happiness even for a second because they chose to walk out your life....

When me and Avery were over, after about 3 weeks and 7 extra pounds (it was me and my Chips O Hoy!) I went to my mother totally upset about it and confused as hell about what to do or how I should feel....she quoted somebody and was like "If someone comes and pushes you down, that's their fault..but if they come back 3 weeks later and you're STILL down on that floor, who's fault is that?" 

Think about it.....